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My humorous thoughts about life.

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Showing posts with label clown. Show all posts
Showing posts with label clown. Show all posts

Thursday, January 17, 2013

The Writer's Post: Masterpiece

I'm participating in a blog hop hosted by Jenn Duffy Pearson, of the blog wine n chat. The topic and prompt for the hop is masterpiece.

As a child I loved to color, even if I'd never been one to stay in the lines. I'd squeeze the wax between a tiny fist, scribble until tired, and then switch the crayon to the other hand. 

"Your child may not enter kindergarten early because she has not established a hand preference," the experts told my parents. As a result, the adults encouraged me to choose the right hand.  I chose left. It would have been fun to be ambidextrous like President James Garfield. He'd show off his classical education by writing in Greek and Latin at the same time. Hmm. Maybe I could have drawn pictures of Fruit Loops with my left and noses with my right, since I didn't have a classical education.

The Clown in The Attic
Creating art with only my left hand did not hamper my abilities to produce masterpieces. In first grade, my clown picture was chosen, from the entire school district, to be framed and hung in the Bracken Building.

The next year, I drew another picture I liked and asked my art teacher where it was. When she said, "On my desk," I thought nothing of getting it and taking it home. Little did I know, the teacher frantically accused the older kids in the school of taking my picture as she searched everywhere for it. I thought it was okay to take it home, why not? Unfortunately, I ripped it while struggling to put on my coat. Maybe another masterpiece would have ended up in the Bracken Building.

Today, I doodle trees while on the phone. That's about it. My early art talent never took off. As a teen, I took an art class for "fun." Apparently, I had too much fun and my art teacher was not happy. Thus, ended my art career. Shucks!


Friday, January 6, 2012

Writer's Post: Making a Difference

This week's Writer's Post topic is making a difference. Here are five things you should know to make a difference:

1.) Before visiting the dentist one has two choices: floss regularly and have a quick visit or don't floss and have some lady jab your sore gums until blood gushes onto her tools and you're screaming, "Holy sh*t!" Flossing makes a difference.

2.)  When coloring hair, put dye on ones roots for ten to fifteen minutes and then put it on the rest of the hair for the remaining time. That way one's hair won't turn bright orange. Not leaving hair dye all over one's head makes a difference in whether one looks like Bozo or not.

3.)  When one has a scab, don't pick. This will keep it from healing and give one a big, ugly boo boo that won't go away–usually on one's face. Not picking scabs makes a difference.

4.)  When one reaches old age, dump the mild kid deodorant for something stronger. Otherwise, one will stink like an old hag. Switching deodorant makes a difference.

5.)  And finally Mitt Romney made a difference for many when he caused them to lose their jobs so he could make money. Watch the video and remember: Who you vote for makes a difference!