Catch My Products

Catch My Products
Click on the image to visit Catch My Products.

My humorous thoughts about life.

"My Humorous and Helpful Thoughts About Teaching / Educational Resources for Your Classroom / Music and Random Fun"
Showing posts with label mechanics. Show all posts
Showing posts with label mechanics. Show all posts

Saturday, October 29, 2011

Silly Sunday: Repairs


After every flight, UPS pilots fill out a form, called a 'gripe sheet,' which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. Mechanics correct problems and document repairs on form.

Here are maintenance complaints submitted by UPS ' pilots (marked with a P) and the solutions recorded (marked with an S). 
 

P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.

S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

*


P: Something loose in cockpit

S: Something tightened in cockpit

*


P: Dead bugs on windshield.

S: Live bugs on back-order.

*


P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.

S: Evidence removed.

*


P: DME volume unbelievably loud.

S: DME volume set to more believable level.

*


P: IFF inoperative in OFF mode.

S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

*


P: Suspected crack in windshield.

S: Suspect you're right.

*


P: Number 3 engine missing.

S: Engine found on right wing after brief search

*


P: Aircraft handles funny. 

S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.

*


P: Target radar hums.

S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.

*


P: Mouse in cockpit.

S: Cat installed.

*


P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer.

S: Took hammer away from midget