The Story of Angela and Eggy

Because you wanted to know . . .

On a May day in a Memphis classroom, multiple eggs were decorated, weighed, and named before sliding down a chute made of shoe box lids into kid designed landing pads. With ten sheets of newspaper and an arms' stretch of masking tape, kids designed these cushions. Thus, The Egg Drop Competition began. 

In order to properly place landing pads, students filled plastic Easter eggs with rocks. These practice eggs weighed the same as real eggs and got cracked before reluctant eggs ran the chute. 

To "egg" them on, kids cheered and clapped and then the trek began. Most eggs fell to their sudden death; however, Angela and Eggy were survivors. They even successfully slid down the high dive, the top of the book shelf. 

The best landing pads were funnel shaped with lots of give. Anyone who folded newspapers put their eggs in grave danger. As winning eggs, they received the reward of going home with the teacher to be eaten.

However, they became blog celebrities on Wordless Wednesday. I know you want to know about the Wordless Wednesday before this one, when I missed it doing something secret. Sorry, but I still can't reveal. I will let you know soon.

#WW: Good Bye Angela and Eggy (You Made Us Proud)

#AtoZ : L Mr. Lansky

Happy Birthday to Mitchell! 

My Favorite Husband

Today, April 13th is not only Thomas Jefferson's birthday, but it is also my husband's birthday. This birthday makes me look like a true cougar. You see, he's been aging backwards ever since he hit fifty. As for me, I prefer to lie upwards. Remember how great I look for 82? So, if I'm 82, and he's 45, Grr!

Come join Music Monday and share your songs with us. Rules are simple. Leave ONLY the ACTUAL LINK POST here and grab the code below and place it at your blog entry. You can grab this code at LadyJava’s Lounge Please note these links are STRICTLY for Music Monday participants only. All others will be deleted without prejudice.

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#AtoZ : I am Not Spoilt!

This morning, my middle child posted a Facebook Buzz Feed Article called,  Were You A Spoilt Child? Readers are asked to tick off everything they owned from Slip 'N Slides to a Darts Board. At the end of the test, the post will tell you whether or not you were spoiled.

The following conversation ensued: 

The Blogging Lounge Photo Prompt: Rock Star

From the first time I strummed my Lil Tykes guitar, I knew I wanted to be a rock star, and it didn't end there. Come elementary school, the neighborhood kids and me formed our band in the front yard. We banged pots, pans, and anything else to make our music. From there, we played high school gigs and  dressed our way to fame.

Kids love our hair dye job. Each one of us has a unique color and style that makes an awesome rainbow when we get together. Ty's balloon shaped hair glows as red as Ronald the clown, while Keifer goes for neon blue feathers. Suse shines yellow sunbeams, while I grow the green leafy look. It came in handy today.

The old saying, "Watch what you wish for" is true. I wanted to be a star. Each night, I dreamed of being swooned over by an audience. But, no one told me how nuts our fan base would be. 

See, after we left stage this morning, a group of loose screws chased our limo. The driver swerved, we hit a wall, and the fans tore our doors off. 

All I could do was run. I headed to a nearby farm and ducked into this old wheelbarrow. As I hide in here, everyone will think my hair is a plant. I just hope those druggies don't pull out my locks and try to smoke me. 

Hey, Hey, I don't want to be a pop star!

Come join Music Monday and share your songs with us. Rules are simple. Leave ONLY the ACTUAL LINK POST here and grab the code below and place it at your blog entry. You can grab this code at LadyJava’s Lounge Please note these links are STRICTLY for Music Monday participants only. All others will be deleted without prejudice.






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#GBE2: Naughty Can Be Nice

When Santa checks his list, twice, he's looking for folks who have been naughty OR nice, but can't one be both? I'm not saying being naughty is good, just that being bad gives beings super strength, agility, and strong thresholds for pain. Nice! At least that's what I see on TV. For example, take a look at the Wet Bandits, Harry and Marv.

Although these two bad boys are about as naughty as one can get, they've achieved superhuman status that keeps them going even in the direst of circumstances. Nice! After all, who else could withstand a hot iron in the face, being burnt, blown up, tripping on marbles, being struck by paint cans, bricks, and anything else Kevin thrusts their way?

But wait, these two naughties are not the first bad guys who were given superhuman abilities.

Remember Wile E. Coyote? Poor little Road Runner just wants to cruise the highways endlessly, with no place to go, but this sicko won't leave him alone. Naughty! But, being naughty has its advantages. He's fallen off cliffs, been whacked on the head with anvils, and as you see to the left, blown up by TNT. Yet like the Wet Bandits, Wile survives. Nice!

Or how about Moe? Constantly smacking one's brothers doesn't get one on the Nice List, yet these crazy brothers survived it all. Of course Santa still doesn't come to Larry, Moe, and Curly's home because he's an antisemite, but that's another post. Naughty!

So the moral of this story . . .  If you want to be protected from harm, you must be naughty. 

Now that's nice!

Musical Monday: You Can Call Me Al

This one cracks me up.

Come join Music Monday and share your songs with us. Rules are simple. Leave ONLY the ACTUAL LINK POST here and grab the code below and place it at your blog entry. You can grab this code at LadyJava’s Lounge Please note these links are STRICTLY for Music Monday participants only. All others will be deleted without prejudice.






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Busy Week

Between starting a new school year, making gifted referrals, parent meetings, and math workshops, I haven't had much down time this week. In fact, when one works ten to twelve hour days, it's tough to post or visit blogs. However, I am glad to learn that I am NOT stressed due to my passing the dolphin test by seeing identical dolphins in the photo. 

Why don't you check out your stress level?

The picture below has two identical dolphins in it. It was used in a case study on stress levels at St. Mary's Hospital.

Look at both dolphins jumping out of the water. The dolphins are identical. A closely monitored, scientific study revealed that, in spite of the fact that the dolphins are identical; a person under stress would find differences in the two dolphins. The more differences a person finds between the dolphins, the more stress that person is experiencing.

Are you ready for the test?

Musical Monday: Let's Do the Time Warp Again

As teens, who went to the midnight showing of The Rocky Horror Picture Show? Did you dress like Janet? Did you throw toast and keep your hair dry with newspapers? I once went with a friend and her dad, who was a professional movie critic. Guess what? 

He liked it!

So get on your feet and dance The Time Warp again.

Come join Music Monday and share your songs with us. Rules are simple. Leave ONLY the ACTUAL LINK POST here and grab the code below and place it at your blog entry. You can grab this code at LadyJava's Lounge Please note these links are STRICTLY for Music Monday participants only. All others will be deleted without prejudice.



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Theme Thursday: Mysterious Pepper Fun

sweet male

While shopping at Kroger, I learned that peppers have sexes: four bumps on the bottom is a female pepper, which is firm and good for cooking, while the three bump variety means a sweet male. I never knew vegetables were sexual beings. Of course, the way they dance around the vine, it shouldn't surprise anyone to learn of magic in the field.

So the females have more bumps and curves. Hm? Furthermore, girl peppers carry more seeds that make her

bloated female

heavier, kinda like that time of the month, although they are permanently bloated.

I also have to wonder if sweet males like to hang on vines with other sweet male peppers or do all peppers have fun together? If the males and females hang together, is it like one big vegetable orgy?

Every time I think I've heard it all, I learn more. I guess some peppers grow red after hanging around with their bumpy bottoms showing. 

Woo baby! Wanna hang on my vine?

You'll never think of peppers the same way, will you?

Edward Sharpe and The Magnetic Zeros

Memphis, Tennessee

Part of Memphis in May is the ever popular Beale Street Music Festival, which brings a plethora of sought after rock stars to entertain the young. Along with the musicians comes thunder storms every dang year, but rain or shine the party continues.

Photo by Judy Lansky

Last night, my girls ventured downtown to enjoy the festivities. My daughter posted on Facebook, "I just fell more in love with Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros (if that is even possible) #edwardsharpe #iloveyou #bealestreetmusicfest." 

So I asked what every mother of my persuasion asks, "Is he Jewish?" 

She said, "No Mom. That's the name of the band not the singer."

I looked up the band on Youtube and found this must share video. Adorable!

Come join Music Monday and share your songs with us. Rules are simple. Leave ONLY the ACTUAL LINK POST here and grab the code below and place it at your blog entry. You can grab this code at LadyJava's Lounge Please note these links are STRICTLY for Music Monday participants only. All others will be deleted without prejudice.



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#AtoZ Meets #WW: Z for Zombies!

I worry about my daughter.

She wears too much makeup.

Plus, she's been chasing after men.

I think she's in with the wrong crowd.

#AtoZ: U Urban Dictionary

One can define kid speak with the help of Urban Dictionary. To tap into this wealth of information, just enter a word, and the definition pops up. 

For example, neathage is the opposite of cleavage. I didn't even know there was a word for a woman's boob hanging out from the bottom of her shirt.
  

Or an Introdouche is someone who introduces himself by bragging about useless accomplishments. You can also achieve introdouche status by introducing your girlfriend as a "friend."

 

Furthermore, spend some time with Urban Dictionary, and you'll find gazillion different types of boogers: phantom, bloody, leaf, runaway, happy, ten dollar, ingrown, bat, or cape––the list goes on and on. 

I'm not sure if my kids know all the definitions at Urban Dictionary, but they are upstanding citizens who would never wheez the juice or become illegal gymigrants.

So whether you want to achieve coolness or to understand what your son means when he asks you to text poon to his friend, check out Urban Dictionary.

#AtoZ: M - Musical Monday

Here's a song for all manly men.

Now that you're done laughing, here's one of my favorite M songs, which I first heard after being dragged to my sister's high school band concert. It was love at first hear. I can see why In the Mood by Glenn Miller topped the charts in 1940.

Come join Music Monday and share your songs with us. Rules are simple. Leave ONLY the ACTUAL LINK POST here and grab the code below and place it at your blog entry. You can grab this code at LadyJava's Lounge Please note these links are STRICTLY for Music Monday participants only. All others will be deleted without prejudice.


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#AtoZ: F - Favorite Son

 

Happy birthday to Daniel, my favorite son.

Listen up, ladies. Have I got the guy for you. He's smart, good looking, and single. Since today is my son's twenty-fifth birthday, it's time to find him a wife. Don't get me wrong, it's not like he's a pathetic loser who's short on women, he has plenty of dates. They just aren't my type.   

Daniel likes Barbie dolls--beautiful, blonde, high-healed women who are definitely not kosher. I think this obsession with Barbies started in preschool when he played with his sisters' dolls in the bathtub. He'd grab them by the waist and fly them through the air while making airplane noises. In the end, the poor Barbies would crash into the wall and maybe lose their empty heads. Don't worry, ladies. He's always a gentleman with living women.

Anyway, my son needs a nice Jewish girl with a kind heart, intelligence, and an excellent sense of humor. She'd have to have one to fit into our family. Plus, liberal wouldn't hurt! Send me your resume, that is if I'm still alive after posting letter F, which also stands for Mom FAIL.

I think this kid just might have my sense of humor too. Plus, he has...

Strong muscles,

a winning smile,

and a big brain.

  

                         

                    Dating Fun Ken Doll By Mattel (Google Affiliate Ad)

Passover Quiz

It's almost Passover and to help celebrate, here is a quiz where you can test your knowledge about this  pain in the a$#  Jewish holiday.

1.) Which traditional food is on the seder plate

      A.)  Chinese egg rolls (like we eat on Christmas)                     

      B.)  Matzah balls

      C.)  Haroset

      D.)  Ham & cheese sandwiches                                                                                                                                  

2.)  How do Jews prepare for Passover?

     A.)  Clean ovens, refrigerators, and spray Windex on flies

     B.)  Ritual fast of the first borns (Ha, ha, he who must not be named)

     C.)  Lug Passover dishes and kitchen supplies out of the attic

     D.)  All of the above

3.)  Matzah is called the bread of affliction because

     A.)  It causes Jews intestinal discomfort after eating it all week

     B.)  Slaves did not have time to finish baking bread when they ran away

     C.)  To punish Jews for all sins committed throughout the past year

     D.)  It tastes bad

4.)  The four questions are read by

     A.) The kid who can drink a cup of wine the fastest

     B.) The first kid to grab the Haggadah

     C.) The oldest kid in the family

     D.) The youngest kid in the family

 

 The Dry Bones Haggadah

Answers: 1.) C  2.)  D  3.) B  4.)  D

If you got all four questions correct, you may be a member of the tribe. :)

                                                                                                                    

 

#Dayum!

My friend Kathy from the Giggling Trucker's Wife has asked us to write about what we are passionate about, so I've included a list of these things below.

1.

Dayum!

My daughter says I can't remember anything because I drink diet soft drinks. That must be why my list is blank.

Dayum!

Furthermore, the commercial states that the average person spends the same amount of time in the bathroom as on vacation. I spend more time in the bathroom.

Dayum!

Kathy writes, "If I didn’t pursue my passions, I think life would be pretty dismal.  Pursuing passions makes life worth living and more meaningful." I haven't pursued much recently.

Dayum!

It could be worse. I could be on a broken down cruise ship with sharks, or err lawyers, swimming all around. 

Here's a fitting commercial for Carnival.

Dayum! Dayum! Dayum!