Saturday, September 13, 2014

Weekend Writing Warriors : September 14

Weekend Writing Warriors

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After last weeks post, I figured I'd jump ahead to this snippet from chapter two where Ben is curious as to why some stranger would call him "Benito." And yes, you missed it, but the weird dude and friend chased Ben.
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       I debated about how much to tell my worry wart mom who'd freak if she knew about the guys who chased me, yet curiosity and fear bugged the shit out of me. I took two steps away from her and then spun around to head back. “Is my real name Ben, or is it short for something else?”
       “Why you ask?”
       “Someone called me, Benito.”
       The color drained from Mom's face as her eyes widened and she covered her mouth with her shaking fingers. Our conversation was cut short when the doorbell chimed and was followed by a loud pounding sound. I stared at the door without moving.

      
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11 comments:

  1. AnonymousSeptember 13, 2014 at 11:24 PM

    And there he was at the door...
    Hope you are having a great weekend!

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  2. Meka JamesSeptember 14, 2014 at 9:22 AM

    dun...dun...dun.... Me thinks Mom knows exactly who that someone is that called him Benito and she's been keeping secrets. Nice cliffy, wonder who's at the door.

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  3. UnknownSeptember 14, 2014 at 9:32 AM

    Oh boy, I'd say she just gave him her answer. And, he'll learn more when he answers the door.

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  4. messymimiSeptember 14, 2014 at 4:21 PM

    Mom, you got some "splainin" to do, as Ricky used to tell Lucy.

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  5. Teresa CypherSeptember 14, 2014 at 8:04 PM

    Oh wow! Unexpected and certainly raises the tension. Nicely done, Joyce! :-)

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  6. BinkySeptember 14, 2014 at 8:57 PM

    Obviously no connection at all. . .

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  7. LA BotcharSeptember 14, 2014 at 9:29 PM

    oh f... fruit!

    this is getting very interesting.

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  8. Chelle CorderoSeptember 15, 2014 at 12:09 AM

    Definitely a cliff-hanger (door opener) moment. Mom's reaction is quite telling, I'm sure she is going to feel quite cornered when that door is opened. Great tension.

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  9. brendaSeptember 15, 2014 at 10:36 AM

    Coming to the story mid flight I agree with all the other comments... hanging on the virtual edge..

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  10. UnknownSeptember 15, 2014 at 11:15 AM

    Mom needs to work on her poker face. lol. Great work here! :)

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  11. Rhonda AlbomSeptember 18, 2014 at 6:17 PM

    I want to know too! Well done Joyce.

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