Catch My Products

Catch My Products
Click on the image to visit Catch My Products.

My humorous thoughts about life.

"My Humorous and Helpful Thoughts About Teaching / Educational Resources for Your Classroom / Music and Random Fun"

Friday, November 18, 2011

Writer's Post: Priorities and My Mole

A Beauty Mark!
Pain or surgery 
   When faced with back pain, I saw three docs in hopes one would say, "No surgery needed." Finally, I had the operation, but it was different with my mole. Dr. Dewane wanted it in a jar, so I sat on the surgeon's table.  
   "It's harmless," the surgeon said. 
   "Bye." I hopped off the table.

Red, golden, or dark brown 
   When the price difference is $8 vs. $80, I'll color my own hair; but, it varies from bottle to bottle. Once the hair flamed bright red and matched my face. You get what you pay for. My mole is brown.

Ignorance or bliss 
   The infamous they say, "Ignorance is bliss," but I'd rather be informed. The Occupy Wall Street message needs to be told. Corporations have avoided paying taxes by buying politicians to vote their passions; but this is a humor blog, and that isn't funny. The mole continues to occupy my leg.

Orange juice or something else 
   I grew up drinking orange juice, but it's my least favorite type of juice. I love oranges but drinking its juice doesn't turn me on. I also grew up with a mole on my right calf. It's been there longer than many of my readers have been alive.

Red or white
 
   I've never been much of a wine drinker but if given the choice, I'll always choose white--less chance of someone noticing it when I spill it on my shirt. Also, if I were to spill red wine on my mole, someone might mistake it for blood and make me remove it.

Ice cream or frozen yogurt 
   I don't notice a difference. People insist that yogurt is better for you. I like it all the same and will eat whatever. I also like my mole, and I'm not letting some knife holder cut it out, even if he offered me a cold treat.

Terror or comedy films
 
   If you've read my blog, you know the answer to this one. For anyone new here, feel free to look around. I dare you not to laugh! No my mole is NOT scary and most posts are not as lame as this one.

Ick another I
 
   Have you ever noticed when writing acrostic poems, you always have two of the letter that stumps you? Is that Murphy's Law? I can't even think of an I for the mole because it's not icky.

Elves or dwarfs

   I've never been into fantasy, although I confess, I enjoyed Tolkien's The Hobbit. I got hooked in chapter five when I read, "What has it got in its pocketes?" Usually mine contain a dirty Kleenex; but, it's not dirty from the mole. It's NEVER leaked fluid!

Shot or the flu
 
   If you'd have asked me thirty years ago, I would've chosen the flu. Now, I've grown up and take shots like a big girl. I once tore out of a doctor's office to avoid a shot. I was only wearing underwear while multiple nurses chased me.What did they expect from a little seventeen-year-old girl? ☺ Of course when they tried to remove my mole, I ran too.

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Wordless Wednesday: Boy Genius

This one's been floating around the internet for years, but it's worth a Wednesday just in case you missed it.


Monday, November 14, 2011

GBE 2: Surprise


Funny that this week's topic should be about surprises because my husband is planning my surprise birthday party right now. We've been invited to Vic's Dirty Santa party on December second (close to my big 50). Although my husband claims this is Vic's annual party, we've never been invited to it.

He said, "Oh, sure. He's invited us before. I just never wanted to go." 

Yeah, right.

Mitchell threw me a surprise birthday party when I turned 30 and 40, so I figure it's time again. Of course, I'm a stink pot when it comes to these things, so he might not want to plan one for 60 (or this year). Ten years ago at the last minute, I told him I was sick of the restaurant we were headed to and wanted to go somewhere else. My bad. I don't deserve him.

I of course, threw surprises for him on his 30th, 40th, and 50th too. The most recent was quite fun. My mother-in-law bought airline tickets to bring our two older kids to town. Without telling my husband, I took the afternoon off and picked up the kids. Later––when I'd normally be home, I called him at work and told him he had to come home because the upstairs toilet was over flowing and I didn't know what to do. When he said he was in the middle of something, I faked anger in my frantic state and told him he HAD to get home now.

Mitchell rushed to the rescue and proceeded to inspect the perfect toilet. "I don't see anything wrong with it," he grumbled.

"Me neither," our son said from behind him. The look on Mitchell's face was priceless, but the picture didn't come out well. :(

I'll let you know how my surprise birthday party goes--or maybe I'll be surprised when it doesn't happen. NAH! By the odd chance that it's not on the second, I'll just figure it's going to be late since the kids can't make it to town until after Christmas.

Here's a funny YouTube clip about a surprise birthday party.