Silly Sunday: Talking Dog

A guy is driving around the back woods of Montana, and he sees a sign in front of a broken down shanty-style house: 'Talking Dog For Sale.' He rings the bell and the owner appears and tells him the dog is in the backyard.

The guy goes into the backyard and sees a nice looking Labrador retriever sitting there.

"You talk?" he asks.

"Yep," the Lab replies.
 

    After the guy recovers from the shock of hearing a dog talk, he says "So, what's your story?"
 

    The Lab looks up and says, "Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA. In no time at all, they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping."

"I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running. But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals.' 'I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired."
The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog.
"Ten dollars," the guy says.
 

"Ten dollars? This dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?"

"Because he's a liar. He never did any of that shit." 

 

#GBE2: Hop on Pop

"Hop. Hop. We like to hop. We like to hop on top of Pop."

"Stop! You must not hop on Pop."

This week's GBE2 prompt is to pick a line from a book and write about it. Hop on Pop by Dr. Seuss is a strong story with well developed characters who like to skate on the dark side. The riveting plot places kids in extreme danger when they resort to Pop hopping.

But let's face it, one should not "Hop on Pop," and here's why. First off, if you're still calling your dad "Pop," chances are, you passed childhood a long time ago. Let's face it. How many kids do you know who call Daddy "Pop?"

So now that we've decided you're quite mature, Pop must be ancient--I mean hairs in the ears, false teeth, cane carrying old! The weak bones of senior citizens cannot handle being hopped on, especially if you're an American. Surely, you've heard the latest studies in the news. Obesity is at an epidemic in the states. With the width of average Americans, do grown fat people really need to be hopping on old men? Then again, there might be more to hop on if Pop is a butterball too. None the less, you might rupture Pop's spleen, break his bones, or God only knows what else.

He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named told me it is a biblical sin for an adult to make a parent bleed or to bruise one's dad. In fact, historically this was punishable by death. Many doctors will not operate on their parents for this reason. So, why in the world would you hop on Pop? Take my advice. Give it up, learn respect, and DON'T HOP ON POP!

Wordless Wednesday: Graduation

Last night we returned from my daughter's graduation from The University of Maryland. Here is a small sampling of some of the humorous photos that were taken.

The University erected a statue in Judy's Honor

A Photo Taken by "He Who Must Not Be Named."

Tassel Troubles

Judy says, "Good bye" to her good friend Testudo.

ZTA Sisters