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Saturday, February 4, 2012

Silly Sunday: The News

I see dead people.
It's Silly Sunday, which means I can post an old joke or for something more stupid, open a newspaper. I choose the latter.

Did you catch the story about Jerry Miller, the retired drill sergeant who the government killed four times? A veteran in Florida was denied pension because, get this, he died! Furthermore, he was asked to repay some $94,000 worth of benefits that he should not have received because he's dead. Miller asked his congressman to help him, but so far, being alive has not been sufficient proof that he is not dead. That makes sense. Look at zombies. They're dead and it doesn't keep them from hobbling around. Some of them even dance.

This story reminded me of my friend Al at the University of Missouri. The school mixed up his student number with that of a dead guy. To make matters worse, they mailed a sorry-about-the-death-of-your-son letter to his mom and cut off his student ID which allowed him his meals. Al marched into the administrative office, flung his arm forward and said, "I'm alive! Feel my pulse." Unlike today's morons, the college believed him.

None the less, calling someone dead who isn't could be worse. Get this:

Doctors and nurses at Pelonomi Hospital in Cape Town, South Africa were baffled when two patients died on consecutive Friday mornings in the same bed.

Checks revealed no bacterial infection, virus or problems with the air conditioning, temperature, cleanliness, nor circulation of air in buildings and rooms; but, interviews with staff revealed the shocking truth.

Each Friday a cleaning lady would go onto the ward and plug her floor polisher into a socket by the bed.

When finished, she would unplug the cleaning machine and replace the plug that was originally in the socket - the life support equipment.

It's okay to laugh. 

Snopes says that the last news story is FALSE.


Claudia Moser said...

For the last part I can't I am sorry! The rest is funny yes!

stevebethere said...

What a stupid woman in the last part It's awful but it did make me giggle t her bad

Have a great week :-)

shelly said...

Stupid is is stupid does, sir. LOL!TFF!

Unknown said...

Unbelievable but true. Interesting to read about stupidity.

revelations said...

if the Government says your must be..I mean they are never wrong and highly efficient..... :)

Catch My Words said...

The last story has been circulating a long time as a true news story. Fortunately, Snopes says it's not!

Darlene ~Bloggity Blogger~ said...

That poor man lives within our "news audience" here in Central Florida. The 3rd time it happened, the media got involved and I thought it was fixed. I almost fell out of my chair when the 4th time hit the news. That poor guy!

Da Dude said...

The report of my death was an exaggeration.
Mark Twain, New York Journal, June 2, 1897

There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?
Woody Allen

Have a great day!

danneromero said...

all that red tape just seems to get in the way at all the wrong times! geez! poor guy. how freaking frustrating. i am frustrated and i am not even him! geez louis!

Jo said...

How exasperating! The gvt, like the bank, does not make mistakes, so I imagine it's true and no one has told him that he has passed. *sigh and removing my hat in reverence*
Good job!

Binky said...

He's dead, but they still expect him to repay the government!

Jo said...

Hey! There's an award for you at my site!

Stop over...

Rhonda said...

Glad to hear the last one was false, although I have to admit I was already laughing when I got to that part. Started literally laughing aloud at "but so far, being alive has not been sufficient proof that he is not dead." Thanks for linking up. Sorry I am so late to visit.