Real Life YoYos #AtoZ

Being 2011, finding yoyos is much easier with Al Gore's invention of the internet. All you have to do is go to YouTube and search, "The People of Walmart." So maybe after viewing those photos, what I saw wasn't that odd, but still, these strangers remain ingrained in my memory.

My family took a vacation to Chicago when I was a little tyke, and we saw some oddities walking down the street as if nothing was unusual about them. A man had a faucet stuck to his head and I embellished this scene in my writing. I combined the scene with the stranger on the Paris subway who leaned over passengers, flapped his hands like he was dog paddling, and said, "Awook!" No, I didn't make this up. The truth is stranger than fiction. But, I did make up the flash fiction story which I've placed at the end of this post.

I have yet to find a story for the man with feathers sticking out of his hat or Dracula, the man who shared a train with my daughter. But fear not. I'm a writer, so these individuals will make their way into my fiction because a yoyo is worth preserving!

I can't believe tomorrow's post is for the letter Z! This month went fast. Please tune in as I discuss my work in progress (WIP) called Mrs. Zimmerman's Donuts. And finally, if you're interested, here's Faucet Head.

Faucet Head

     A scraggy man with a faucet stuck to his forehead pulled his Harley  into the reststop, while Alanna poked at the busted drinking fountain. Standing behind her, he flipped his hands like a dog paddling through a crusty pond. The stranger, reeking of dead fish, leaned over her shoulder and said, “Awook!”


      Alanna calmly stroked her dry throat and reached for the stranger's forehead. “Mind if I get water?”

       “Aw-oo-ook!" He leaped back. "This thing ain't got no water. You turn that dang crank, and me brains is falling out.”

      “It's ninety degrees, and every fountain's broken."


      “Sorry. Cain't help. Stingy plumber want two-hundred-dollars to fix me head."

 

X Marks the Spot #AtoZ

X marks the spot with a dot and a dot

and a dash and a dash,

and a great big question mark.

With pinches and squeezes and cool summer breezes,

and a knife in your back.

 Blood rushes down

and spirits rising up. 

Boo!

The letter X (Alias unknown)

How many of you chanted this stupid, sadistic rhyme on your friend's back as a child or had it done to you? Who writes this stuff anyway? It's kinda creepy having someone fist your back and call it a knife. Wouldn't it be better to rake invisible leaves or something? Or how about a good old fashion back rub? If you have to write poetry with the back rub, maybe you could quote Charlie Sheen on your back saying something profound like, "Boom, crush. Night, losers. Winning, duh." Uh, maybe not.

Here is my new and improved version of X Marks the Spot. If you don't like it, WRITE YOUR OWN!

X draws a line

With a vine and a vine

and a great wiggly scratch.

With fingernails while you yak

but don't "cool breeze" slobber on my back! 

With a palm on the shoulder

Not too hard, I'm getting older.

And forget the spirits because that's just plain weird.

If I can write a post for X, I can write anything. See you tomorrow when we explore real life yoyos (That's slang for foolish people). 

Wilberfoss #AtoZ

No. My son's name is not really Wilberfoss. At least that's not the name we gave him at birth.

Not his Birth Name/ Not his Actual Photo

It all started when Facebook circulated a "Rate Your Parents" app that was good for a few laughs. By clicking the allow button, Facebook would analyze your name, tally how many folks from the year you were born were given the same name, and give your parents a score (A-F) on how creative they were in the naming process. So Daniel, the child with the eighth most popular name from the year he was born, decided to rate his parents, AKA us.

Next I knew, he participated then sent me a Facebook message, "Mama! You got an F."

I replied, "Studies show that kids with more common names are better accepted in society."

"Studies show you got an F."

Fine. Daniel wants a creative name, I'd find him one. I searched name sites to see what I could discover. Then I added my own unique twist to the name "Wilbur." Viola, Wilberfoss!

"You want a creative name. Okay, son. From now on your name is Wilberfoss."

Daniel, err Wilberfoss, changed his Facebook name and we received an A+! All would be great except Facebook refused to allow him to change his name back to Daniel. So, almost two years later, my son is still named Wilberfoss. Even some of his friends have started to call him by that A+ name.

That should teach him to complain.

Tune in tomorrow for the letter X. Now what am I supposed to do with the letter X?