I recently read an intriguing article Six Great Ways to Remind Yourself That You are Poor at http://www.cracked.com. The author, although a bit dirty, had some valid points about just how difficult it is for a young person to survive in this economy. His last point made me think about something that I believe my kids know, but I would like to reiterate this idea to them and the rest of the world. DO NOT WASTE YOUR MONEY GIVING ME AN EXPENSIVE FUNERAL!
If my loved ones were to dare bury me in the gold casket above or anything other than a plain pine box, my ghost would haunt them by screeching, "You stupid, @$$! Why did you throw money into the ground?" Let's take a step back and think about it. When one is in a state that needs a casket, do you really think the person cares what kind of box they are in? You're dead! You can't feel the cushions anyway. I want to be buried in a pine box. Then, dear children, take the money you saved from not buying a fancy, smancy funeral and enjoy a good party on me.
Money should be spent on the living, not the dead. I come by my thoughts from my dad, who was buried in a plain pine box. He used to tell us, when I kick the bucket get JC (the custodian at his store) to nail a few boards together. I feel sorry for folks who feel they have to prove to others that they loved their parents by buying the most expensive coffin at the mortuary. That's silly. Pine Box Only! That, dear children is not negotiable. It's my final wish.
42 comments:
You are right, since in the end the departed will not feel a difference just the love from the ones left behind!
Valid point and certainly something to consider. Thanks for sharing your Dad's final wish.
I don't even want that much, just cremate me, put me in a paper bag, and toss my ashes in the wind at the beach. I don't want a grave that my family will feel obligated to visit. I want them to think of me when they go to my favorite place instead.
You said it! DH and I already have our plots (it was actually a wedding gift, LOL) and it's the cheapest, fastest way into the ground for both of us. What matters most is the memories we leave behind!
This is so profoundly practical and simple! But of course, why do something so impractical?
So very right! I've actually changed my mind to cremation, just to save the husband some money. If I were to find a coupon for that service, I'd damn sure use it.
I just read what Martha read, and that's almost exactly what I told my husband. I want to be spread in the ocean. I'm a beach bum at heart and I don't think there could ever be a better resting place. Swimming with the mermaids sounds divine, to me.
Same here, same here. I don't have kids but I always tell people to not waste a dime on a fancy coffin. "If you can get away with it, just chuck me in the city wastebin," I tell them. Odd stares and horrified gasps guaranteed!
I've heard of bodies being put in rental caskets for appearances. I also believe in spending money on the living. Also, I prefer cremation.
We have a "family tree" already in place on our church grounds where our cremains will go, inside a biodegradable bag. Easy peasy and cheepo. There will be a big party after the service(s)!...
It is a stupid idea indeed. But I do wish for a white casket, either for myself or any other dear one I might loose in the ..distant, very distant future.
Yes! I completely agree with everything you just wrote here! I have chosen cremation and told my husband if he could get away with shoving the ashes in a Ziploc bag instead of an urn, all the better. It's so crazy what a funeral can run a family!
I ABSOLUTELY agree! My family and I talk about this all the time! You hit the nail directly on the head. Do NOT put my money in the ground, you better spend, spend, spend away! Awesome post!
I'd love to think my kids would go one step further... cardboard coffin, no service, no booking cars and flowers etc. Then take a holiday to my favourite place, scatter my ashes on the Tor... done deal *wink*
How true it is that some people think they are showing they loved the person in such a way that in the end they need the coffin to prove it. When my mother was dying I learned you can also buy coffins at Costco!! Just in case the kids have a hard time with the pine box, let them know about Costco lol!
Janet :)
My kids won't have trouble with a pine box. It's a commonly accepted Jewish practice that you give your money to charities in memory of the loved one rather than buy a fancy coffin. In fact, I bet you can't find an expensive coffin with a star of David on it. It just doesn't happen in our faith.
I wish one could stick a body in the ground without any sort of box, but there are laws around here that demand the coffin. Health department or something... but we don't embalm.
Thanks for all of the wonderful comments!
If we were smaller, we could have a goldfish funeral, flushed down the toilet.
That is a beautiful practice, I never heard of it before :)
It's good that you put this on your blog. That way, they have to listen to you. :)
Excellent. We have made our arrangements with our local funeral home and all has been decided and money set aside for the same. No decisions, no big deal. Just have the service you need to grieve and move on. Cremation for us and nothing fancy. Kids want a burial spot so I found we can share one plot. done.
Such a waste of money...fancy dancy farewells! not for me.
Funerals are extremely expensive. Funeral home directors will say it is the last thing you can do for your loved one, but honoring their wishes is the number one priority. You are right that once you are dead you can't enjoy it anymore and anything spent on a funeral is like throwing money away. I had never really thought of it that way.
Kathy
http://gigglingtruckerswife.blogspot.com
Absolutely agree - a cardboard box is just as good! And I don't like masses of flowers either, far better to give a donation to charity.
I hope this post will save your kids some money a LONG LONG time into the future.
Agreed! Besides, once it's in the ground, who's going to know?
i completely agree... but not even a pine box for me... i've requested cremation. i want to float around the world, above ground... :)
my thinking as well, martha...
my parents bought all us kids plots when one of my brothers died, long ago... but, over time, i've realized cremation is what i want....
yes, cremation will save money, but i like the idea of being 'out there' everywhere....
oh, ever seen the show 'six feet under'?... there is a scene when someone wants to simply be wrapped in cloth and buried near a tree, away from a graveyard... seemed very serene, and peaceful... isn't that how it should be?
rental caskets? so they take you out when the service is over? then what? interesting....
sounds good...
True, Even a pine box will do for us, It will make ppl whom we leave behind feel better, if we leave instruction on how we would like it :))
A real waste of money to be put underground.I would love just a bunch of beautiful flowers as a farewell gift!
The rental casket is expensive-looking and then they put the body in a cheaper one. Also, some bodies are cremated after and the rental is for the service.
Love the simplicity of the thoght thread here and so much cremation...just do the same for me and spread my ashes over a nice waterfall somewhere. I'll be happy.
Cremation is against my religion and would upset a lot of people. In fact, we respect the completeness of the body so much that we buried the tip of our daughter's finger when she lost it in an accident. Also, when my dad had his legs amputated due to Diabetes, each toe, leg, etc. went into the cemetery ground. Then when he died, all the pieces were dug up and buried in one pine box. I didn't, however, bury my uterus. I guess that means I won't be baring children in the afterlife. ;)
Cremation is what I would prefer. You are right about not throwing money into the ground. We won't be there to see but hope our wishes are fulfilled.
Same here.
OMG...LOL!!!
Interesting how so many prefer cremation! I do also. My husband is Catholic. He says they are against it? I don't want to be a burden to anyone. And, isn't the idea of freedom Heavenly?
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