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Monday, April 11, 2011

Idiot Drivers #AtoZ

You've seen the usuals--Miss Mascara-Lady brushing her lashes at the green light or Mr. Beer Guzzler weaving in and out of his lane. But one of the worst drivers I ever met was Mr. I'm-Not-Going-to-Drive-Fast-But-You-Can't-Pass-Me-Either. Have you met him? He was eighty years old and wanted to make sure I drove at a safe speed. Flying down the highway's passing lane at a whopping 40 mph, he made his Chevy rattle. As soon as an opportunity opened to pass on the right, Mr. Annoying floored it. I mean this dude drove a number that matched his age, and there was no passing him. Then, as soon as traffic clogged the right, he slowed back to forty. Was this guy for real? Lucky for him, I'm not a lulu with a gun because a Road Rager would have blasted his little gray head.

Unfortunately, he's not the only idiot driver on the road. After circling a parking lot twice, I finally found a person ready to leave. So I put my blinker on and waited a good distance back to allow the driver room to back up. Miss Rude Idiot had already driven way past this spot and missed it. Tough luck; get over it! But nooo. After seeing my signal, she put her car in reverse and blocked the person trying to back out of MY spot. Oh yes she did. And she was determined not to move until I backed up and gave her MY spot. If it weren't for the person being held captive in the lot, I would have stayed all night, but I couldn't do that to him. I'm sure she caused road rage and got hers eventually.

Years ago, I decided to do my best to control my blood pressure when idiot drivers are near. Okay, not totally. I still get frustrated when I can't turn right on red . . . not because of a sign, but due to the idiot driver who's blocking my lane. But when push comes to shove, pun intended, will this person's actions matter tomorrow? Should I really allow them that much control over my emotions? Of course not! I should just throw a rock at their car and drive off. --Just kidding.


Tundiel said...

This is why I don't drive, and probably never will. I just wouldn't have the patience.

Thanks for being my 80th follower! I'm returning the gesture, as I like the look of your blog very much, looks both interesting and funny, which is right up my alley!

HumorSmith said...

I don't have a car, so Nyah Nyah Nyah! And also Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk while I'm at it. Soitanly.

Joyce Lansky said...

Thanks for stopping by. Now I've got to get in my car and face the idiots!

The Racer in the Black Convertible ;)

Glynis said...

I have lived in NY, Chicago, and now in Arizona. I am sure that Arizona is the capital of idiot drivers. I have thought of driving around with a carton of eggs.
Thanks for following I am now following you.

Name: Luana Krause said...

Crazy drivers can drive you crazy!

Rhonda@laugh-quotes said...

I remember going to Boston with my college roommate/best friend and the drivers there were the worst ever. It seemed to be a Boston habit that when the light turned green, the first person in the left turn lane would try to punch it through before the straight traffic started. However, that annoying lady in your parking story might be worse. Too bad you don't live in LA, I think you could have shot her.

Joyce Lansky said...

OMG! I forgot about those Boston Drivers.

I'll tell you, both of those drivers got me so mad, I was tempted to do naughty things (throw my Coke on the old man's car when I finally did pass him and key the door of the woman's car). I'm proud to say, I resisted temptation in both situations. It was tough!

Karen Peterson said...

With the long commute I've got, I am very familiar with these drivers. And I hate to admit that I'm sometimes guilty of being one of them.

THE SNEE said...

That's why I don't like cars. They DRIVE me crazy!
Thanks for dropping in at THE SNEE and leaving that great comment!

Sandee said...

San Francisco is a joy to drive in...well if it's not commute traffic and then you are standing still. I can so relate to both of these things. Drives me batty sometimes. I've noticed the more people there are the ruder folks become.

Have a great day. :)