#AtoZ: I'm Going to Be Sagging Soon!

It's been a long time coming, but I finally can see myself sagging. To really sag a lot, I must spend time around an abundance of food, such as cookies, crackers, fruits, and gels. Maybe, one day I'll sag more than anyone in town.

But I wish I didn't have to sag in the early morning hours. 

Whatever it takes to support Superman as he leads the training for the Century 100 Mile Ride, again. Did you think I was talking about my body sagging? Ha! I'd rather bike than sag, but the cars passing close on the road scare me enough to wet my pants. So I'll just sag.

#AtoZ Musical Tribute Brought to You by The Letter 'R'

Reo Speedwagon

"Ridin' the Storm Out"

Red Hot Chili Peppers

"Right on Time"

Come join Music Monday and share your songs with us. Rules are simple. Leave ONLY the ACTUAL LINK POST here and grab the code below and place it at your blog entry. You can grab this code at LadyJava’s Lounge Please note these links are STRICTLY for Music Monday participants only. All others will be deleted without prejudice.

PS: Because of spamming purposes, the linky will be closed on Thursday of each week at midnight, Malaysian Time. Thank you!

#AtoZ : The Queen

Her hard, smooth body slides to capture whoever gets in her way. One space, or clear across the board, gives her power unlike the others. She cleverly works with her lower ranks to plan her attack. To lose her makes a win difficult at best for she is the queen.

"When you see a good move, look for a better one."

-Emanuel Lasker

“Strategy requires thought, tactics require observation”

-Max Euwe

“A bad plan is better than none at all”

-Frank Marshall

"Choose your move carefully in Chess as in life."

#AtoZ : Passover (Plague of Blood and Monthly Bloating)

Once I was a slave in Egypt. (If I didn't admit to having been a slave, I'd be the wicked son in the story we tell every year about Pharoah enslaving us.) Moses asked Pharoah to let us go, but he said, "Nada!" 

So God smote the Egyptians with a bunch of nasty plagues. For example Pharoah once in his bed, awoken with frogs on his head; frogs on his pillow, frogs on his toes, frogs on his shoulders, and frogs on his nose. At least that's what the song says. 

He also heard locust––annoying insects hopping around, boils––worse than bad acne, and blood––not the kind that comes each month, but that would have been a better punishment for a guy. I'd have given him cramps, bloating, and moodiness, too. There's many more plagues, but let's keep this short.

Jews aren't supposed to celebrate anyone's hardships, so we spill a drop of wine for each plague, and suffer from less wine. But all is cool. We get four cups at the seder. 

Returning to the story, the Jews left Egypt while baking bread. As a result, it didn't have time to rise and we have to eat tasteless, flat stuff that gives us gas. That's the Joyce's Digest version of Passover.

Your welcome.

#AtoZ : "O" Oh, no! What Happened?

Psych! 

Did I get you?

#WW #AtoZ : Nice Date

Remember prom night in high school? 
You wore your best to a high class restaurant. 
Then, you texted about it throughout dinner!

#AtoZ : Matzah

It's time again to give up real food for flat crackers that give one digestive problems. We can purchase all kinds of derivatives for matzah, such as matzah fartful, too. Oh, yeah, don't forget the Gas-Ex with the Passover supplies. And remember, Moses's line, "Let my people go," takes on a whole new meaning.

It's going to be a great week!

#AtoZ : L Mr. Lansky

Happy Birthday to Mitchell! 

My Favorite Husband

Today, April 13th is not only Thomas Jefferson's birthday, but it is also my husband's birthday. This birthday makes me look like a true cougar. You see, he's been aging backwards ever since he hit fifty. As for me, I prefer to lie upwards. Remember how great I look for 82? So, if I'm 82, and he's 45, Grr!

Come join Music Monday and share your songs with us. Rules are simple. Leave ONLY the ACTUAL LINK POST here and grab the code below and place it at your blog entry. You can grab this code at LadyJava’s Lounge Please note these links are STRICTLY for Music Monday participants only. All others will be deleted without prejudice.

PS: Because of spamming purposes, the linky will be closed on Thursday of each week at midnight, Malaysian Time. Thank you!

#AtoZ : Killer Cookies

I had a craving for cookies. Our cupboards were bare, and I don't eat sweets, anyway. But, to get the satisfaction, I filled a soup mug with pancake mix, an egg, baking powder - spilled, too much vanilla (oops), Splenda, and I added a few decadent chocolate chips. I didn't measure anything, and the batter was too

salty, but with the made up concoction in the oven for eight minutes, we shall see.

I Yi Yi! These taste horrible! I kid you not, even the cookie monster wouldn't want them. Do you think it's the fact that I spilled the vanilla or put too much baking soda in them? Of course, burning these suckers didn't help, either. 

Next time, I'll follow a recipe because even my dog cookies taste better than these. Today, I tossed my cookies!

#AtoZ : Jewish Geography

The Jewish community has always been a tight knit group. If I want to know something about a Jewish guy, I can make two phone calls and learn his life story.

For example, my freshman year of college, I met a young man who asked me out for New Year's Eve. He had told me about his year in college, yada, yada, but I didn't know him at all and wasn't sure if I'd made a smart decision when I told him, "Yes." When my gut told me to do research, I made two phone calls and found out more about him than I should have.

Turned out, the dude had lied to me. He was still in high school and had done some immature and violent things that made it clear that I needed to stay far away. So, I broke our date. I know it wasn't nice, but a girl has to think of her safety first.

A few years later, I was talking to a friend about Jewish Geography. I told him the story about my broken date, and he laughed hysterically because he knew the story from another angle. Turns out this high school kid had bragged about how he was coming to a party with a college girl. When he showed up alone, people asked where I was? When he told them I'd broken the date, they cheered.

I know he wasn't a nice guy, but I wish I hadn't put him through that. I hope he has forgiven me. It would have been better had I never met him.

#AtoZ : I am Not Spoilt!

This morning, my middle child posted a Facebook Buzz Feed Article called,  Were You A Spoilt Child? Readers are asked to tick off everything they owned from Slip 'N Slides to a Darts Board. At the end of the test, the post will tell you whether or not you were spoiled.

The following conversation ensued: 

#WW #AtoZ Hair

Jossie O. has great hair!

Ernest has a cute little daughter. Thanks for lending me her photos for WW.