Wordless Wednesday: Four Leaf Clover

Last month, I found a four leaf clover, which means, “Good luck.”

Let me try that again. It means,

 “GOOD LUCK.”

Well? Any day now.
F - this. I'll make my own luck.

 

#GBE2: Never

GBE2's blog topic this week is "Never." Here's my top ten list of things I would NEVER do.

1.)   SCUBA dive

In high school, I took a SCUBA diving class. When Mr. Lundt mentioned the risks,  I dropped the class.

2.) Become a US president

I know--powdered wig--humor me!

History has shown that most US presidents leave office with gray hair. I'm already working hard enough to cover the gray I have and don't need more.

3.) Sky dive

If I wet my pants on the roller coaster, I don't think people would appreciate yellow rain from the sky. Which brings me to the next one.

4.) Roller Coasters

5.) Eat bugs and crap

I'm not into eating gross stuff, and it's probably not kosher anyway. Not that I keep kosher, but if faced with eating bugs, it would be a good time to start.

6.) Be on Survivor

Life has taught me that I'd be the first voted off the island, so I think I'll skip the show. 

7.) Pierce a tongue

8.) Wear a bikini

Do I have to explain this one?

9.) Convert

Sorry dear friends. I know you pray for me, but I'm strong in my Judaism and if that means burning in hell, let's hope someone supplies sunblock in the afterlife.

10.)  Get Published

Psych! Although it feels hopeless at times, I'm going to do it. I decided that even though Bompsy has been around the block more times than Lindsay Lohan (or should I now say Miley Cyrus?), it's a great novel and deserves a home.

Wordless Wednesday: Look What I Found

Hey, Kids, if your mom has a blog, you might not want to play with her phone.

Photos Deleted. :(

Busy Week

Between starting a new school year, making gifted referrals, parent meetings, and math workshops, I haven't had much down time this week. In fact, when one works ten to twelve hour days, it's tough to post or visit blogs. However, I am glad to learn that I am NOT stressed due to my passing the dolphin test by seeing identical dolphins in the photo. 

Why don't you check out your stress level?

The picture below has two identical dolphins in it. It was used in a case study on stress levels at St. Mary's Hospital.

Look at both dolphins jumping out of the water. The dolphins are identical. A closely monitored, scientific study revealed that, in spite of the fact that the dolphins are identical; a person under stress would find differences in the two dolphins. The more differences a person finds between the dolphins, the more stress that person is experiencing.

Are you ready for the test?

Wordless Wednesday: Fine Print

This sign hangs in Ikea.

Note message in lower right corner.

Dang! I was looking forward to a room-sized hot dog for 50¢.

Maxine

Gotta love this lady!

Wordless Wednesday: What Happens When Big Kids Bounce?

Did you hear it? Josh said, "Let's all bounce at once!"  

Famous last words. Hee hee.

#GBE2: Siblings

I was told I was part of the family because of a trade with the Indians. The tribe received beads, while my family got a little papoose with a red spot on her forehead. That birthmark was the true coloring of an Indian girl, me. It might have been okay if my brother and sisters had told me they were teasing; however, this stunt continued for years with little me believing it all. Okay, so I was gullible, but isn't that part of being tiny among the mighty sibs? 

They had an 8½, 6½, and 4 year jump on me, and they used it to their advantage. I was their trained mouthpiece in acquiring what Mom and Dad would have never agreed to. As the Chevrolet ventured down the road, with the three of them shoulder-to-shoulder in the backseat while I sat wedged between the adults in the front, he-who-must-not-be-named would point out the window and say, "Look, Joycie. What do you see?"

Next came my hopping dance, "McDonalds! McDonalds! Let's go to McDonalds!" Sure enough the car would slide into the lot for hamburgers, fries, and chocolate shakes, which no one would have gotten if one who wasn't so stinkin' cute had asked.

I was also subjected to constant bouts of tickling from He-who-must-not-be-named and TV high jacking, too. I don't know which was worse: being held by the arms and tortured or forced to watch Bonanza. Tickling is a definite form of abuse, especially when Gilligan's Island is on, but I was too little to stop it. 

Then there were the other set ups. 

"If you tear your blanket, 

you'll have many." 

"Why don't you go ask Mr. Slatkin,

the famous conductor neighbor, 

for his autograph early in the morning?"

Laughter as a piece of liver is shoved in my mouth 

or 

hearing fart sounds as I bite into a chicken butt.

He-who-must-not-be-named gets angry when I write about him, but he was by far the most lethal sibling. I wonder if he would have subjected me to constant torture if he knew that one day I'd have a blog.

Wordless Wednesday: Haircuts

My daughter and I decided to give each other haircuts. Although neither one of us has had any training in this nor have we done it before, it looks easy enough. 

First, Erica cut my hair.

     Before

After

Next I cut hers.

Before

After 

So, what do you think? 

 

Treading the Off Beaten Path: The Waiter

I once saw someone tread 
          off the beaten path.             

While Rhonda and I sat in a Boston restaurant waiting for our server, I noticed a spot on my fork. I told the cute, young waiter about my spot, and he fell into a hysterical routine.

"Spot on fork! Spot on fork! We must have happy customers." This goofball grabbed my fork, spoon, and knife as well as Rhonda's set. Next, he cleared the salt, pepper, and any other condiments off the table, and the table cloth.

"We must have happy customers," he chanted while charging across the room. Within moments, the waiter returned, spread a fresh table cloth over the wood, returned condiments, and reset our entire table.

"Spot on fork! Spot on fork! We must have happy customers." 

I don't know if I ever laughed so hard or gave such a generous tip. Rhonda has recorded travel adventures across the world at Laugh Quotes, but I don't think she's ever found another waiter like this one.

Promote Your Book Bloghop: Meet and Greet

While catching up on blog visits, I learned that I'm signed up for a Meet and Greet blog hop. I don't remember signing up, but then again, I don't remember much these days.

So, listen up Buttercup: since I rarely answer questions about myself, please seize the opportunity to learn secrets about me. I bet you didn't even know I can touch my nose with my tongue and have the rarest common blood type, AB Negative. But no one wants to know that.

This is what was asked . . .

What is your favorite animal?  

My dogs, or course

 

Where have you traveled to (outside of your country), and what's been your favorite destination? 

I'm an American who has traveled to France, Italy, Ireland, Israel, Canada, Mexico, and Bermuda. Each place has been wonderful, so it's hard to choose a favorite. I enjoy warm places with oceans and beaches, but then again history rocks!

How many siblings do you have?
I have one brother and two sisters, and they are all older than me, which means they are REALLY old.

 

Are you a lefty or a righty?

I'm a lefty, which means I'm in my right mind. The left side of the brain controls the right side of the body, and the right side of the brain controls the left side, so us left handed people are the only ones in our right minds.

Since picking a favorite book is nearly impossible, who is your favorite author or which one has had the most influence on you in your writing career?

I love Margaret Peterson Haddix and Gordon Korman. Peterson for her heart-pumping action and Kormen for making me laugh. There are many other fab authors. As far as who has most influenced my writing career, it would have to be all of those Midsouth authors who I've met through SCBWI. Josh Adams, Peterson's agent, will be at our next SCBWI conference. Woo hoo!

Joyce Lansky teaches intellectually gifted children, is active in SCBWI, and has completed five novels. In May 2011, she published a story in AppleSeeds magazine, a division of Carus. She currently blogs at Catch My Words. If her blog makes you laugh, please inquire about her MG and YA humor manuscripts that are looking for a home. jlanskyATcomcastDOTcom.

#AtoZ: V for Very Special Blogs

I want to highlight three Very Special blogs that I visit regularly.

http://bethere2day.com is a fun place for online randomness. Steve, from London, posts funny jokes, stories, and cartoons regularly that always make me laugh. Please check him out.

I also visit Rhonda daily at http://www.laugh-quotes.com. Rhonda has traveled all over the world and entertains with amazing and humorous stories. She's worth a click.

Finally, Binky and friends make me laugh every Monday & Thursday. These adorable comics, complete with colorful artwork, give a peek into the world of wombats. Find him at: http://www.comics.wombania.com.

I couldn't get through the week without a laugh from these Very Special blogs! Therefore, I am presenting the Very Special Blog award to these bloggers. The rules are to give this award to 87 others and write 98 facts about yourself. Just kidding! You don't have to do anything, but I'd love to know that you saw this post.

#WW Meets #AtoZ: T Taunting Squirrels

"This squirrel is a huge jerk!"

Photo and caption by Judy Lansky

#AtoZ: Q for Q-tip Voo Doo Doll

My daughter had a horrible soccer coach who regularly caused her grief with his unfair coaching, so I got him. I grabbed some Q-tips and made a voodoo doll of Coach L. Although I didn't know magic chants, nor did the voodoo doll make his shoulder hurt, it brought a smile to my crying daughter.

Years later, I learned that this coach did not need me to give him Q-tip voodoo pain. He buried himself by getting fired over an illegal recruiting scam. 

Karma at its best!

P.S. Don't mess with my babies.     

                                 

Wordless Wednesday: #AtoZ Bows

Today's Wordless Wednesday is brought to you by the letter B.

Honey Bow Bow

You can do what you want to me because I only weigh 25 pounds.

Tough girl doesn't look so tough today.

                       

Wordless Wednesday: Photo Retake

1993

2013

Wordless Wednesday: What's Different?

♭♬♩ One of these things is not like the others. ♫♪♩